Friday, 25 April 2008


Sorry I've been a bit quiet recently. I got really ill and had to lie low. A mate of mine killed a guy when he had flu and the germs got him caught!

Anyway. Bought myself a new toy at the weekend. Didn't realise it would be this big from the picture on the website though. Might send it back. Although I crushed the skull of a dog and a weasel this morning with it. It's pretty good.

Friday, 14 March 2008

accidental kill

Really annoyed today. 
I made an accidental kill last night. So irritating. I was supposed to meet a friend for dinner but I accidentally killed someone in an elevator.

Obviously I had to cancel and deal with the body. Makes me look like an amateur. Well I'm not! You'll see.

Thursday, 6 March 2008

assume the position

I googled "body parts" a few minutes ago. Trying to refresh my knowledge of anatomy. Come in useful to minimize blood and get rid of the bodies etc. 

Anyway, this image popped up. Funny thing is, this is the exact position a woman I threw off a factory roof landed in last week. I thought that was pretty funny. (Obviously she didn't the numbers on balloons poking out of her.)

Monday, 3 March 2008

Welcome to Killer Blog

I should have washed my hands first, but I’m too excited. This is my very first post. Welcome to Killer Blog! Diary of a serial killer and a bloody good read.

This blog is a way for me to document my killings in a way that might be interesting to other people. Lots of killers keep trophies. This is mine. But I don't want to keep it to myself. If you’ve read my profile you’ll know that the E in SMILE stands for Enjoy! And I do enjoy it. I love it. And I wanted to start sharing it all for the first time.

Just last week I cut a guy’s testicles off and put them in the fucking fruit bowl!! Ha ha. I’d love to be there when the family find those. “Oh Gary, I miss him so much – pass me a grape!” Brilliant. See? Fun!

You never see this side of killers in the movies – and definitely not in the news. Well I’m going to tell the other side of it. My side’s fun, a little crazy at times, but like my dad used to say to me: “If you’re not living, you’re dying.”